Unlock Conversations: Choosing the Perfect Back-Pocket Question for Networking

Social awareness is essential for making strong connections when networking and creating meaningful conversations with others. A thoughtfully chosen back-pocket question can be a powerful tool, helping you to navigate small talk, build meaningful connections, and make a memorable impression. It’s surprising how a well-placed question can transform a conversation, setting the stage for lasting professional relationships.

Why Social Awareness Matters in Networking

When it comes to small talk and networking, having a strong "back-pocket" question can be the key to unlocking memorable and meaningful conversations. A thoughtful question sets you apart, shows genuine curiosity, and builds a foundation for lasting professional relationships. But how do you choose the right question? This blog explores the art of selecting a powerful, versatile question that reflects your personality and values, allowing you to engage others naturally and authentically. Whether at a networking event, casual meet-up, or formal gathering, the right question can be your secret to leaving a lasting impression.

Marshall Connects article, "Unlock Conversations: Choosing the Perfect Back-Pocket Question for Networking"

What is Social Awareness?

Social awareness is a core competency of emotional intelligence centred on our ability to recognize, understand, and respond to the needs of others. It is crucial for developing strong relationships. By accurately perceiving emotions in others, you can interpret the subtle cues, like body language, that people send during conversations. Observing others in social interactions when networking provides you with valuable information to help make a positive impression.

How a Back-Pocket Question Can Open Doors

Starting a conversation can be challenging, and it doesn’t always go smoothly. Some people are reserved and may feel uncomfortable sharing, especially during a first meeting. Believe it or not, having a back-pocket question can be a powerful tool for learning and getting to know others better, especially in networking settings. It demonstrates genuine interest and keeps conversations flowing even when there’s a lull.

Being prepared with a question can help you manage potentially awkward situations and spark interesting dialogue. The next time a conversation becomes stale or uncomfortable, bring out your back-pocket question. You’ll likely notice a positive shift in how the discussion and interaction progress.

Tips for Selecting Your Question

Using your emotional intelligence is key when selecting your back-pocket question. Avoid topics that may be controversial, like politics or religion, and instead focus on questions that encourage positive and engaging responses. Ideally, choose something open-ended that reflects your personality, industry, or even hobbies. For example:

“What do you enjoy most about…” This question can be a great conversation starter as most people are passionate when speaking about things they enjoy.
Other ideas include asking about pets, children, or hobbies, which are topics people often love discussing.

Examples of Back-Pocket Questions

Here are some versatile back-pocket questions for different settings. These questions invite open, engaging conversations and help you connect authentically.

Professional/Networking Context

“What’s something you’re currently excited about at work?” This question shows interest in their projects or passion points rather than job titles or responsibilities.
“How did you get started in your field?” People love sharing their career journeys, and this question helps you understand their motivations and backgrounds.
“What’s the best career advice you’ve ever received?” This question can prompt insightful answers and also offer valuable advice.
“If you could change one thing about your industry, what would it be?” This opens discussions on challenges and innovations, especially in fast-evolving fields.
“What’s one skill you wish more people in your field had?” This question often leads to discussions about industry trends or skill gaps.

Casual/Social Context

“What’s something new or interesting you’ve learned recently?” This question can lead to engaging discussions about books, podcasts, hobbies, or life experiences.
"If you could spend a year anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?” This one sparks conversation about travel dreams and personal interests, which are fun and lighthearted.
"What’s something you do to unwind after a busy day?” This opens up conversations around hobbies, self-care, and balance, revealing aspects of someone’s personality.
“What’s a goal or project you’re working on now?” This can reveal the person’s current focus and professional or personal passions.
“If you could have dinner with any historical figure, who would it be?” A classic question that often brings out unique answers, reflecting interests in history, philosophy, or culture.

Building Genuine Connections

“What’s something you’re grateful for today?” This question invites a positive response and opens a conversation on values or recent experiences.
“What’s a challenge you’ve recently overcome?” When appropriate, this can lead to a deeper, more meaningful conversation, as people often appreciate sharing growth stories.
“What’s something you’re looking forward to?” This shifts focus to plans or dreams, bringing an element of excitement into the conversation.

Creating Memorable Connections

Using these questions can lead to engaging, memorable conversations that go beyond standard small talk and help you build authentic connections. As you head into your next networking event, remember that a thoughtfully chosen back-pocket question can be your secret weapon for making meaningful connections. By inviting others to share their passions, insights, and experiences, you stand out and create space for genuine conversation. Networking and small talk isn’t just about swapping business cards or LinkedIn profiles; it’s about building mutually beneficial relationships.

Next time you’re in a room full of new faces, be ready with a question that sparks curiosity and connection—see where it takes you!

As you develop your social awareness skills and practice using these back-pocket questions, you’ll become more skilled at making them work for you. You may be surprised by how well they open doors! For further insights on building social awareness and emotional intelligence, check out my book The Power of Emotion, A Practical Guide to Making the Most of Your Emotional Intelligence.